The Interview Show: Saiyuki
by ProdigiousGirl
Summary: In the long running Interview series it's Saiyuki's turn to be interivewed! Chapter 3: Yaone and Goku
1. Part One

P'g: Hey! I wrote this (yes, this one too) a while ago. It was about year ago when I first started getting into Saiyuki. When I wrote this (as I explain later in the interview with Kougaiji) that I had only see the last four episodes of Gensomaden and the Requiem movie.

* * *

The Interview Show

"_With Miss Oober herself, Holly!"_

(The audience cheers and holds up sayings with Holly's name on it and various other things)

Holly: Hey, Hey! How's it hanging everyone? Did you miss me? On this addition of the Interview Show, we'll be talking with various characters from Saiyuki! Hurray! So, shall we get started…?

(The audience claps as Kougaiji comes on stage)

Holly: Hello, Kougaiji, how are you?

Kougaiji: I'm fine.

Holly: You don't mind if I call you, Kou, do you? Your name is just so long.

Kougaiji: I'd prefer Kougaiji…

Holly: TT;;; alright then…but can I at least have it "Kou" for the script?

Kougaiji: I suppose as long I don't see the script…than it should be ok.

Holly: HURRAY!

Kou: …

Holly: So, Kougaiji, I must know…what's up with the rivalry between you and Goku, or much more so, Sanzo?

Kougaiji: They're stopping me from getting my mother back.

Holly: Oh, how so?

Kougaiji: My stepmother…

Holly: That's Lirin's actually mother, right?

Kougaiji: Right. But as I was saying, my stepmother wanted Sanzo sacred scrolls in order to reawaken Gyumao-

Holly: Who?

Kougaiji: Gyumao…

Holly: Who the heck is that? I'm sorry, I must apologize, I've only seen the last four episodes of Gensomaden and I saw Requiem…that's all.

Kougaiji: Gyumao is the demon king.

Holly: Uh-huh, uh-huh (nods head while listening)

Kougaiji: He is causing demons to turn bad…

Holly: But then why aren't…er…Goku and Hakkai and…that dude you're with (flips through notes) ... Do…ku…ga…ku…ji…. Um…yeah…why aren't they bad?

Kougaiji: First of all…Hakkai used to be human-apparently…-

Holly: (nods head) yesh, yesh, that's right.

Kougaiji: and Goku is…well…Goku…

Holly: Maybe it's because he's got like…a 'god-like' status…

Kougaiji: (mutters something about how impossible that could be) Anyway, Dokugakuji is…

Holly: That's wonderful, but why would you work for a women you don't like…?

Kougaiji: I never said that…

Holly: I mean…that's just sad…

Kougaiji: O.o what are you talking about?

Holly: Don't you take vacations?

Kougaiji: What?

Holly: Cream pie, or banana pie?

Kougaiji: What does that have to do with anything?

Holly: I dunno, but I like Lemon Meringue!

Kougaiji: Um…

Holly: Well, I'm glad you were here and congrats on getting married to Yaone!

Kougaiji: O.o what? That never happened…

Holly: Bye!

Kougaiji:(glares) _/what a retarded kid…/_

(Kougaiji leaves the stage a bit confused. The audience is also confused)

Holly: What an excellent way to start off the show, now, let's get some boring people out of the way…that Dokugaku guy! Hurray!

(Dokugakuji comes out looking a little confused himself)

Holly: So, how's life being as boring as you are?

Dokugakuji: I'm not boring.

Holly: Most certainly, but you did have some cool lines in Requiem…

Dokugakuji: Um…

Holly: You're name is long too…

Dokugakuji: So…?

Holly: I mean, who names their kid DOKUGAKUJI…?

Dokugakuji: Hey, I don't like you insulting my name.

Holly: I apologize, anyway, what was it like marrying Yaone…?

Dokugakuji: Huh? I never did that…

Holly: (giggles)

Dokugakuji: You're doing this to piss me off, aren't you?

Holly: Ahem, as I've mentioned to past guests…there are two rules on this show…1) never insult the hostess, and 2) this is a non-bias show.

Dokugakuji: But what does that have to do with swearing…?

Holly: You're not allowed to swear…

Dokugakuji: But that's not a rule…

Holly: It is now.

Dokugakuji: (starts becoming a bit frustrated)

Holly: I've seen so many clips of you killing your mom…has it now become a game or something?

Dokugakuji: O.O! WHAT DID YOU SAY? I SHOULD KILL YOU! (grabs his sword out)

Holly: (still sitting in her chair calmly) If you smash my blue fluffy chair, who many special guests like Horo Horo-chan, Taichi, and Rock have sat in, I will be beyond vexed. (nods head) Though I apologize for what I said.

Dokugakuji: (calm, but still mad) Fine. (sits down)

Holly: Anyway, what are your feelings towards your brother?

Dokugakuji: He's my brother, what feelings am I supposed to have?

Holly: …(blinks)…brother feelings…

Dokugakuji: (laughs…which confused Holly and the audience) He's ok, but I'm not going to prance around and save him all the time.

Holly: I don't think Gojyo needs it…

Dokugakuji: No, I don't either.

Holly: But, if you don't care that much, why'd you save him so many years ago?

Dokugakuji: He was a kid…and what mother was doing was wrong. She would have killed him!

Holly: Aw, how nice…looking out for your little brother. I'd probably do the same thing. I have a little brother too! Anyway, thank you for being here…you turned out to be not so boring after all…

Dokugakuji: …Alright then. Good-bye.

(Dokugakuji leaves)

Holly: ok, let's get to some people I know better…everyone, let's welcome Hakkai!

(Fangirls wave posters and scream 'I love you' as Hakkai happily walks on stage and waves to everyone)

Holly: Hello, Hakkai, how are you?

Hakkai: Very well thank you. And you?

Holly: I'm doing very well myself, thank you. As we get started, I must ask you this question?

Hakkai: Yes?

Holly: How's life been now that you've married Yaone?

Hakkai: Huh? I never did that…

Holly: …We all know you did at some point, but that's ok.

Hakkai: I assure you, I didn't…but anyway…

Holly: You used to be a teacher, right?

Hakkai: Yes.

Holly: That must mean being a part of the orphanage made you Catholic, right?

Hakkai: What? Um…I suppose.

Holly: But you're a Buddhist now?

Hakkai: That's correct.

((A/N: I heard he might be Taoist...can someone correct me on this...))

Holly: And Hakuryu's your love child?

Hakkai: O.o what?

Holly:(major sweatdrop)I had hot chocolate today, you must forgive me not making any sense (giggles)

Hakkai:(sweatdrop) I see…

Holly: But on a serious note, why would you kill thousands of demons?

Hakkai: For Kanan…

Holly: Ok, so if Kanan told you to jump off a bridge, you'd do it…?

Hakkai: I don't think she'd ask me that…

Holly: But she got you to kill thousands of demons…

Hakkai: No, I only did that to save her.

Holly: I see! But do you think she'd want you to kill to save her?

Hakkai: No, but unfortunately I wasn't thinking straight.

Holly: If you could, would you go back and change that?

Hakkai: Hmmm, that's a good question…if I could go back and change it; I'd probably go back far enough to save her from being captured. But if all of that didn't happen then I would have never have met Gojyo, Sanzo or Goku.

Holly: Do you think you'll ever fully recover from it?

Hakkai: I don't suppose I will, but how can I? I will always remember it.

Holly: I suppose it's better that you do remember it. Whether the memory is good or bad you can always learn from it.

Hakkai: (chuckles) I agree.

Holly: Well, I wish you the best of luck on your journey to the west.

Hakkai: Why thank you. I wish the best of luck to you and your show.

(Hakkai waves to the cheering fans while he leaves)

* * *

P'g: Alrighty! There's the first of 3 Interview parts with the Saiyuki Characters! Next up is Gojyo, Lirin and Sanzo! 


	2. Part Two

The Interview Show

"_With Miss Oober herself, Holly!"_

(PART TWO)

* * *

Holly: Red eyes, red hair, everyone look out for…Gojyo!

(Gojyo comes out waving to everyone and winks occasionally at some beautiful women in the crowd)

Holly: Hi Gojyo!

Gojyo: Why, hello beautiful…

Holly:(sweatdrop) How are you?

Gojyo: Well, today's been a pretty tough day, you know having to baby-sit the monkey and all, but seeing you has been a real treat.

Holly: (giggles) Thank you…but anyway, how has life changed since you've started hanging out with the rest of the Sanzo party?

Gojyo: Well, things sure have gotten more interesting.

Holly: What's your opinion about your teammates?

Gojyo: Teammates? I wouldn't go so far as to call them teammates…but well…Sanzo has issues…that's plain and simple. So does the monkey…he's got even more issues…then there's Hakkai…he has 'being nice' issues…

Holly: So everyone has issues…

Gojyo: I guess so…

Holly: Even you?

Gojyo: Yeah, probably…

Holly: How many? Ten?

Gojyo: Ten issues?

Holly: (giggles)

Gojyo: What's so funny about ten issues?

Holly: Never mind. You obviously don't play tennis.

Gojyo: No…

Holly: Ok…so…why exactly do you not get along with Goku?

Gojyo: How can I? He's got a stomach-brain! He can't go 2 seconds without thinking about food!

Holly: So…he's hungry…big deal…

Gojyo: he's hungry all the time! I'm sorry, but that's just not normal…

Holly: Well…he HAS been stuck in a mountain cave for 500 years… ( Which means he's seen two shaman tournaments…yay!)

((A/N: Shaman King...don't ask...))

Gojyo: What the hell is a shaman tournament?

Holly: Never mind. Now for my last question…what was it like marrying Yaone?

Gojyo: Wonderful.

Holly: O.O! What…you're supposed to be confused! -.-;; darn…

Gojyo: I'm just tooooooooo smart for you!

Holly:(glare) Yeah, yeah…anyway, good luck on your journey.

Gojyo: We're not leaving until tomorrow…so if you'd like to stop by tonight… (smirk)

Holly: Uh…(major sweatdrop)N-no thanks, I'm very busy…

Gojyo: Oh well, suit yourself…

(Fangirls cheer as Gojyo leaves waving and winking)

Holly: Now, let's go to a commercial break!

(5 random commercials go on)

Holly: Welcome back everyone…now we have…Lirin!

(Lirin bounces out happily waving her arms around like crazy)

Holly: Wow, you sure are an energetic person!

Lirin: Woot!

Holly:(sweatdrop) Right. Now, let's see…what do you think of the Sanzo party?

Lirin: THEY SUCK!

Holly: …Oh?

Lirin: YEAH!

Holly: Why so?

Lirin: JUST BECAUSE!

Holly: (blinks) Ok…

Lirin: WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT TO KNOW!

Holly: …--;;; Why are you being so loud?

Lirin: …o.o…huh? I'm not that loud!

Holly: Right, anyway, I've heard of you being paired with Goku, any comment?

Lirin: O.O! WHAT THE HELL? WHO THE HELL SAID THAT! NO WAY! I SHOULD KILL WHOEVER SAID THAT!

Holly: Um…

Lirin: I mean…that's just a no-no! Ew! No thanks (continues on with the reasons why…even though, they're not really reasons)

Holly: Um…that's wonderful…but anyway…what's your reason for joining your brother on his journey?

Lirin: I just felt like it!

Holly: Oh?

Lirin: Yup!

Holly: (blinks) Ok…well…I guess that's all I really have to ask.

Lirin: No more? Aw…that's sad…oh well. Bye-bye!

(Lirin skips off stage, while some random fans cheer for her)

Holly: Riiiiiiiiiight, anyway, here's the smoking, drinking monk with hair and an attitude…Sanzo!

(Sanzo enters the stage looking a little…aggravated. Millions of fangirls cheer for him.)

Holly: Hello, Sanzo.

Sanzo: Hi…

Holly: So, how are you?

Sanzo: Annoyed.

Holly: Why so?

Sanzo: Because this is extremely stupid.

Holly: (glares) I hope you're not referring to me.

Sanzo: Well if this was you're idea, than it's more than obvious I'm referring to you.

Holly:(glare) Alright then, because I'm non-bias I'm going to ignore that.

Sanzo: What does being non-bias have to do with it?

Holly: I don't know, but it's the only excuse I can come up with right now.

Sanzo: That's pretty lame.

Holly: You think you can come up with something better?

Sanzo: Don't have to.

Holly: Oh, why not?

Sanzo: Because I'm not stupid, that's why.

Holly:(glares but quickly ignores)I'd also like to ask…how's life been now that you've married Yaone?

Sanzo: Like hell if that'd ever happen. I don't like girls.

(Holly and about 60 percentof the audience start to giggle)

Sanzo: (glares) What's your problem?

Holly: Nothing! Anyway, why do you smoke, drink, and have hair-not to mention an attitude problem, if you're a monk?

Sanzo: Who ever said I wanted to be a stupid monk…

Holly: Than just change your profession. It can't be that hard.

Sanzo: …

Holly: Sanzo?

Sanzo: …

Holly: …Sanzo?

Sanzo: …

Holly: …

Sanzo: …

Holly: …

Sanzo: What'er you looking at?

Holly:(glares) a snake….what do you think? Why in the world didn't you say anything when I said your name?

Sanzo: I don't talk to simpletons.

Holly: (glares) You seem to think everyone is uncouth…

Sanzo: Then perhaps I shouldn't talk to anyone.

Holly: Is that humanly possible…?

Sanzo: Sure it is.

Holly: So…you wouldn't even talk to Goku…

Sanzo: Nope.

Holly: Is _that_ possible…?

Sanzo: Considering what?

Holly: That's he always around 24/7 talking and eating away, and 'bothering' you.

Sanzo: So…

Holly: You like Goku!

Audience: AAAAAAWWWWWW

Sanzo: WHAT? (pulls out gun)

Holly: O.O! What? All I said was that you care about him! You would've killed him a LONG time ago if you didn't! (nods head) It's just common sense…

Sanzo: (gives Holly an evil glare)

Holly:(sweatdrop) Hey, I didn't say you LOVE him…geez…

Sanzo: (still evilly glaring at Holly)

Holly: Alright, fine, go…

(Sanzo gets up and leaves while thousands of fangirls cheer for him and say how much they love him)

* * *

P'g HURRAY! There's part two...and the last two, Yaone and Goku will be in the last chapter! Hazzah! 


	3. Part Three

The Interview Show

"_With Miss Oober herself, Holly!"

* * *

_

Holly: Alright, now it's time for a feminine touch! Let's all welcome…Yaone!

(Yaone walks on stage while fans cheer)

Holly: Hello Yaone.

Yaone: Hello, though before we get started, I must ask-

Holly: How has life been now that you've married Kougaiji?

Yaone: But I haven't.

Holly: Hakkai?

Yaone: No.

Holly: Dokugakuji?

Yaone: No.

Holly: Gojyo?

Yaone: No…

Holly: Sanzo?

Yaone: No.

Holly: Ok, so what did you want to ask?

Yaone: I wanted to know why you kept assuming I married everyone.

Holly: I _don't know _but it's funny…

Yaone: Maybe to you.

Holly: And that's _all _that matters.

Yaone: Is it now?

Holly: Now and forever.

Yaone: Alright then, though you should know I'm not married.

Holly: Do you wish you were?

Yaone: Um…not at the moment.

Holly: To whom?

Yaone: But I said I-

Holly: Please, just answer the question.

Yaone: But I really don't know…

Holly: Fine then…for random sake we'll just say…that rock over there…

Yaone: Why would I marry a rock?

Holly: Hey, you're the one who let me choose…

Yaone: No I didn't…

Holly: FINE, then _you _choose…

Yaone: But I said I didn't want to…

Holly: Then I'll choose…

Yaone: But that doesn't make any sense…

Holly: Sure it does!

Yaone: No, it doesn't.

Holly: One day it will, Yaone, one day…

Yaone: (glare)

Holly: So anyway, how's life with the Kougaiji-iku or ikku or whatever it is...?

Yaone: It's fine.

Holly: Do you get paid for baby-sitting Lirin?

Yaone: No…

Holly: How sad…

Yaone: Um…

Holly: Because we're on page 7 and that's my limit…I'll have to let you go.

((A/N: I never expected that I'd put these up on Fanfiction so this is a Microsoft Word thing...))

Yaone: That's alright, I suppose.

Holly: Wonderful…good luck on your marriage…

Yaone: But I didn't…--;;; never mind…

Holly: I knew you'd see it my way… (evil laughter)

(Yaone slowly and sadly moves off stage, but is sorta cheered up by her fans)

Holly: Now, it's finally time to conduct our last interview. He's an energetic ball of fire…for the love of god, welcome Goku!

(Goku excitedly runs on stage bouncing around everywhere happily. His fans bounce and cheer too. He's finally told to sit down.)

Goku: HI!

Holly: I'm glad you're so happy!

Goku: I'm glad too!

Holly: So, how are you feeling today?

Goku: --;; very hungry…

Holly: But…didn't you have anything at the buffet backstage?

Goku: Oh, that thing? You really don't consider that a buffet, do you? It's so small!

Holly: O.O! Small! That thing takes up two large tables!

Goku: --;;; yea, but it's still small…

Holly: (mumbles things to self) Anyway, how life been?

Goku: --;;; too long.

Holly: Would you like me to kill you?

Goku: No…

Holly: Ok, but can I at least give you a hug?

Goku: …No…

Holly: (sadly)But why?

Goku: …Because…

Holly: Can Sanzo give you a hug?

Goku: Why the hell would Sanzo want to give me a hug?

Holly: I dunno, we'll just pretend he does…

Goku: But he doesn't…

Holly: Ahem…_pretend_… (looks up to see Goku swirling around in his seat looking at all the cameras)

Goku: Wow, what do those big black things do!

Holly: They're taping you.

Goku: Huh? What does that mean?

Holly: It means that…well…it's recording every thing we're doing right now, and later it'll be put into another box, and that box connects to a bunch of other boxes, and those other boxes are TV's and people watch TV.

Goku: So people can _see _me?

Holly: That's right.

Goku: COOOOOOOOOL! (runs up to a camera and pokes it the camera explodes)

Holly: AH! Not again! This is what happened with Tima back at the Metropolis interview!

((A/N: See the Metropolis Interview for reference.))

Goku: (blinks) Was that supposed to happen? I hope I didn't break it…I'll just have to test it out on next one…

Holly: Noooooooooooooooo!

Goku: (pokes the next one…it explodes too) (blink)

Holly: Stop! You're ruining it…(sees there is only one camera left) RUN! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD RUN!

Goku: WAIT! COME BACK! (chases the camera)

(The bodyguards jump on Goku, but because Goku's so strong he easily pushes them off)

Holly: Goku! If you touch it and it explodes no one will be able to see you!

Goku: (stops) Really?

Holly: Yeah!

Goku: (sits back down in chair) It's a good thing I didn't touch it then…

Holly: (glare) Yeah…right…

Camera man: Phew… (wipes forehead)

Holly: Now…a lot of people say you're gullible, naïve, and stupid…what do you think?

Goku: Huh? I'm none of that stuff!

Holly: Why so?

Goku: Because, it's not like I don't know what's going on! I know we've got to go to the west stop whoever is making the demons 'go crazy' with the minus wave!

Holly: Ooh, so smart.

Goku: Yup! (sings) I am so smart, S.M.R.T!

Holly:(sigh/sweatdrop) Now, one final request…

Goku: Yeah?

Holly: can I PLEASE have a hug!

Goku: …No…

Holly: What if I gave you brownie?

Goku: Make it a brownie and a meat bun, and you've got yourself a deal!

Holly: OK!

Goku: Ok, but you have to give me the food first…

Holly: But it's backstage…

Goku: Then no hug…

Holly: We'll go double then…give hug now…double food later.

Goku: …Hmmm…ok !

(Goku gives Holly a hug)

The audience: AAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWW…

Random Dude in Audience: (coughHOLLYLOVESGOKUcough)

Holly:(glares at RDiA)… Now, just before we get you your food…let's close this session up!

Goku:(frowns) But I want my food noooooooooooooooooooow…

Holly: (glare)…Now I know why Sanzo and Gojyo consider you a whiner…

Goku: What about Sanzo?

Holly: Never mind…this is Holly and Goku saying…

Goku: …What?

Holly: You were supposed to say something…

Goku: Was I?

Holly: That's kinda why I paused…

Goku: Oh…

Holly: --;;; Let's try this again…This is Holly and Goku saying…

Goku: (opens mouth to say something)

Hakkai: (jumps out of nowhere) Remember kids, never be like Sanzo.

Goku:(is upset)HEEEEEEEEEEEY, I was supposed to say something…Hakkai!

Holly: -.-;;; oh well, maybe next time…Bye everyone!

(Credits role as Holly sighs while Goku complains to a chuckling Hakkai)


End file.
